Friday, September 24, 2010

I guess it must be the flag of my disposition

 

I was angry when I left the house for my walk this afternoon. I’d had an argument with my son who yes, is still staying with us. It’s a long story and one I’ll not go into here. Suffice it to say that he exasperates me. Completely.

And so I headed out to clear my head, hoping to expel some of the frustration. I took the hiking poles and headed on the down trail, the one by the barn that heads down the side of the hill. I’d gone only about 50 yards when I came upon a beautiful turtle right in the center of the trail. He had a rust-orange colored head and red-rimmed eyes. I stood there, pondering whether or not I should go back up for the camera, then finally decided not to.

I knew it would piss me off even more if I came back with the camera and that turtle was gone.

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So I kept going. And the walking began to help. Especially when I saw the view above.

I changed my mind about the camera when I saw the way that the sun was hitting the trees and I ended up going back to the house to get it.

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When I got to the spot where the turtle had been, the only thing left was his trail, which I tracked to the edge of the woods and deep brush. Oh, well.

I brought the macro lens just in case.

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I love fuzzy caterpillars.

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Here’s what it looked like today as I stood at the lower edge of the down trail.

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I started calming down and was glad I’d gone back for the camera and the extra lens. I used the macro to get the shots above and below (as well as the caterpillar).

All is well now. I mean, my son is still the same but I’ve just changed how I’ve decided to feel about it.  You can’t change things that are beyond your control.

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And I’m proud to say that I did this without the aid of wine. It’s only Thursday for cripes sake.

My mother used to say that all the time. “For cripes sake, Clarke, would you stop recording everything I say?!”

My father’s name was Clarke. I used to think he was Superman. When we were young, he told us adventure stories all the time – stories in which he was the hero.  They were wonderful and until I was in about 2nd grade, I really believed that my mother had been captured by an Indian tribe and rescued by a family friend – my father. He’d always been in love with her, he told us, and after he rescued her, they got married.

More on that later. And about the tape recording.

Luv,

47 comments:

Dawn Dutton said...

Awesome photos. I am glad you went back for your camera! lovely... walking and enjoying nature is a great way to relieve stress....hugs to you.....dawn

Ellen said...

Sorry you missed the turtle. Bet it was neat.

Alli said...

As always your pictures are lovely! Today I particularly enjoyed the fuzzy caterpillar and the sunlight through the trees in the first picture. Beautiful work! A walk is great way to relieve stress, glad you could take time for you.

Lisa said...

It is funny how our children still do this to us and yet we find our ways . You sure have and sorry you were so pissed.
Amazing photos my friend.
They are beautiful. Im glad you got out .
Hope you feel better . Hugs coming your way.
PS. Im not sure if I said. I did get my new camera straps.
Thanks for the link. I love them.

Jen at Cabin Fever said...

Nothing pisses me off more than seeing something I wish I could photograph, but know I can't or don't have my camera.

At least that walk was gorgeous and you were rewarded with a great view!

Cabin Fever in Vermont

The Wife of a Dairyman said...

I'm so glad you went back for your camera...beautiful photos:)
Pissed and no wine?! Good for you! But now that you're in a 'better' place you can have a glass....right? Cheers to you:)

Jo said...

Kate, those photographs are absolutely exquisite. I feel as if I could step right into them. In fact, I just might. It's raining here today.

And I know what you mean about kids (even grown ones) being exasperating. Argh. I keep a few extra bottles of wine just for emergencies, and even a bottle of gin or two. :-)

These Nine Acres said...

Ahhh...the power of nature and a camera. I feel the same way about my son. I would love to talk to you about it one day. We have lots in common.

I love the story your dad told you and I can't wait to hear more.

Chesapeake Bay Woman said...

That is a very, very sweet tale your father told you. One of my favorite quotations is "The best thing a father can do for his children is love their mother."

Clearly yours did. That is a rare gift.

Regarding cripes sake - I had a teacher who said, "Aw for cryin' in a bucket," which essentially means cripes sake. Poor guy, he said it almost daily. We were awful.

beth said...

oh, how our sons keep us in a state of "arrrghhhh"

Low Tide High Style said...

Sometimes getting behind the lens is just what the doctor ordered, and that walking stuff can't hurt either!

I hope you have a better day tomorrow, and you are so right, we can't change other people, or circumstances, the only thing we can change is ourselves and how we react.

Your dad sounds like a wonderful man who truly loved your mother. I can't wait to hear more about him..

Kat

Deb said...

good for you to change the way you feel about it...you can't change someone...but you can change the way you feel about it...love the photos...

Cloudia said...

You are awesome (and human :)




Warm Aloha from Waikiki

Comfort Spiral

Deltaville Jamie said...

Perhaps your dad knows my aunt. She lived with pygmies in Africa and had tea with the Queen, among other adventures.

I used to think my dad was related to Albert Einstein because his name is Albert.

mrs mediocrity said...

that made me smile in a whole bunch of ways...the son thing, the sun thing, and the way you reminded me of one of my mantras, that the only person whose behavior i have any control over is my own...
can't wait to hear more about clarke...

Egghead said...

I can feel your frustration about kids. Sometimes I just don't get the things they do. But only sometimes. Most of the time it is good...but those other times kind of negate the good. Sorry you didn't get the shot of the turtle...but glad you feel better.

Your Blog Hostess said...

The top 2 photos are so ethereal. Sorry about the junk with your son, because in the years ahead it will all fade away and be just that.... junk to forget about.

tammie said...

Beautiful photos! Walks and nature always help me when nothing else does. Prayers for a wonderful Friday.

alphabet soup said...

Clarke eh? His middle name wasn't Kent was it?
And yesterday i see the fabulous pink countertops have made a return to the blog after a long absence.
Ms Soup

DAnna said...

What were you thinking - going for a walk without your camera?? Don't let it happen again..I want to see that turtle!

Walks are always a good way to clear your head..hard to stay upset when there is so much beauty around.

Dawn said...

Hooray for the calming walk and sunshine through trees and fuzzy caterpillars!
(I am thinking yay for the wine too! But am happy you could get peace without it. for now....weekend is nearing:)

deborah said...

So happy a walk helped you let off 'steam'. I have 2 adult children living with me..so I feel your pain.
The light is so lovely in your photos...as always, I love them!

Gail said...

Nature would cause the drug companies to go out of business if we would all take our daily dose.

Beautiful pictures...the light was perfect.

Nancy's Notes said...

Those photographs are gorgeous. Nature has a way of calming and in my book, and out with my camera is good for the soul! Smart woman to go out for a walk~

You are a great writer!

Have a great day.
Nancy

Joe said...

Great pics Kate. Nothing like a walk to help calm you down. I do the same thing.

Jayne said...

It's when we realize that it truly is all in our own control that we can breathe and not let the "stuff" consume us. Glad your camera and the beauty gave your mind and spirit the diversion it needed. Hugs to you my friend.

Fearless Nester said...

That must have been so sweet to see that turtle right at the beginning of your walk! It was a gift meant for you and you alone to see (at least that's the way I justify it when I haven't brought my camera with me!) I am staying tuned in to hear more about Clarke and the recordings. xo ~Lili

seeker said...

Thank you for going back for your camera! What a gift you share with your photos :-)

I'm looking forward to hearing more about your parents...the story as you started it is intriguing! And the story your dad told about your mom--- so sweet!

Diana (Di) said...

Hello Kate,

Beautiful panoramic photos! and I have enjoyed looking at some of your other posts.

A walk, silence and amidst such beauty is most calming and of course done so in the beautiful state of Maryland... I miss being there, just not the cold. ;)

Daryl said...

What a wonderful memory .. and a wise choice .. now if only I could learn to let things go ... xo

The Japanese Redneck said...

Beautiful pictures.

One of the hubbies sayings is "That it bees what it bees". Don't know where he came up with it. But it is now one of my favorities too.

Your dad sounded like he was a fantastic man.

Carolynn said...

How great the healing arms of Mother Nature are. I LOVE the caterpiller. That's the most adorable shot of its crisp little nose and furry behind.

I think I would have adored your father. How magical your childhood sounds. I'm looking forward to hearing more on that subject.

Blessings,
Carolynn

Mental P Mama said...

I may need to come on down there and deal with this. I miss straightening out errant sons....and, cheers! It's Friday;)

Marilyn said...

this too shall pass Kate.....thank god for walks and cameras.....and george.....even though...he is a boy!!!!
My father had some tales to spin too....about living in the desert and eating cheese and jam!!!! (?)

Kerri said...

Lovely images Kate!

PS - I can relate to that exasperation too :)

Caroline said...

Oh a photo walk is good for the soul. You got some wonderful shots. Though...I kinda wish you took some shots of that turtle! :)

Khaki said...

First can totally relate to being exasperated by a son or daughter. Your story about your Dad reminded me of my Dad. I was the baby and always had a thousand questions. My Dad made up answers if he didn't know or was just tired of my endless queries. When I was little we'd go on a 6 hour drive to visit his parents and we went through a town that had a Continental Can Company. I asked what they made and he said CANS. 14-15years later I married and my DH lived in that town. First time he took me there I commented wondering about what size cans they made and for what. He told - it's a paper manufacturing plant they don't make cans. So see you could have been grown and married when you finally got it figured out. Thanks for jogging that remembrance.

Char said...

((hugs))

Anonymous said...

Hi Kate ;)
Kids (teens)...whatever..enough said. A walk is the best remedy to keep yourself sane and it is the best therapy to change a mood. Your home and surroundings are so peaceful a walk just down that laneway would be heaven to me. Dads, they are the most wonderful people...mine passed away a year ago...how I would love to hear him say "Hi Kimmy" How was your day! just one more time.
Smiles to you!!!
Kim

Peppermint Ph.D. said...

I had to step outside myself today...my middle child and I see eye to eye on absolutely nothing. Isn't it something to be able to love these human beings so much and to be so flumoxed by them at the same time?
I'm not as strong as you...I broke out the wine :)

Oliag said...

Parenting never gets easy does it? Hugs to you...and I hope you have a chance to do lots of walking this weekend:)...with your camera:)

Emom said...

Nice story......I think you might have inherited something from your dad....smiles.

becky up the hill said...

LOL Kate, first I thought the only left of the said turtle was his 'tail' and it made no sense..I'm glad you got to take a walk and capture a beautiful afternoon on a hard day. Blessings

Jeanne Walker said...

Stressed spelled backwards is desserts. Coincidence?
I think not! ~Author Unknown

Mary said...

I'm so glad you went back for your camera. the light coming through the trees is gorgeous!!! and i love the bokeh i those qal photos, too.

My son was driving me nuts yesterday, too. He needs to get a job so that I don't kill him.

Just kidding about the killing part. I think.

Mary said...

OOps, did I say qal? I meant goldenrod. duh.

Jill of All Trades said...

It's amazing how a walk with nature can calm one. Great photos.